Out of Surgery

4-29-09 Kecia went in yesterday and to her great delight BOTH drainage tubes were removed from her breasts. They were able to add the first little bit of fluid to her shields (temporary breast implants) so she feels a little more "lady like" now. She went in at 9 am this morning to have her new medi-port put in. I got the call at 11:15 that everything went great and that she was in recovery trying to wake up. As we speak (or as I type) she is currently waiting in her room for the nurse to come and wheel her downstairs. I just spoke with her on the phone (3:00) and she sounds really good. She said to thank everyone for their prayers and support. She reports that she is always so nervous before each surgery and that she can really feel the comforting presence of God through our prayers. We are so blessed to have such a remarkable team behind us.

4-27-09 Well our girl seems to be healing up nicely...slowly but surely. She has far less pain now and has lowered her pain meds consideribly to an as needed basis. She still moves like an old granny and can't go very long without rest but her doctors are very pleased with her recovery. She goes in tomorrow morning to see about getting the drainage tubes removed. It looks like they will probably take one out but the other still looks like it isn't quite ready yet. She is scheduled to have her new port put in on Wednesday but that is also in question since her levels are still pretty low and it looks like she may have a stomach virus that she is trying to conquer. She is very pleased with her new team of doctors and that is a HUGE answer to prayer. Kecia is starting to get very restless with this whole "recovering from surgery" thing. She feels good enough to want to do things but not actually good enough to do them. She came out to our house for dinner last night and said it was the highlight of her week. (oh, now that is so sad becasue we literally just ate dinner and sat around talking) She is back to work, doing reports and projects from home which keeps her mind occupied and gives her that sense of accomplishment that Kecia desperatly needs. I am so thankful for that! It does so much more than just pay her bills. She can't stand to just "do nothing", so having work to do is another real blessing that we are grateful for throughout all of this. I will probably wait until Wednesday to update on both doctor visits...We are praying for the doctors' wisdom as they make important decisions about Kecia's treatment. I feel quite certain there will be more good news to come!

Good News and Bad News

Update 4-23-09 Kecia met her new oncologist today. He was recommended to her by Dr. Ladly (Kecia's new "cancer team leader") Kecia and her mom really liked him. He is very direct, knowlegable, and "pro-Kecia". It was comforting that he agrees with Dr. Ladly's plan to discontinue the Taxatere and use only the once a month dose of Herceptin to keep the cancer at bay. He actaully gave Kecia the option of going ahead with the hysterectomy in a few months, or keeping all the rest of her parts and just keep doing the monthly shot that keeps her in menopause. The down side to getting a hysterectomy is...well...kindof obvious, but the down side to getting that shot every month is that the shot is the size of a crochet needle that puts a pill size capsule into her stomach, and then leaves her achey for several days and teary with hot flashes the rest of the month. Luckily, she doesn't need to decide right now and she will just continue with the shots until she decides otherwise. The oncologist checked Kecia's latest scans and thinks that maybe her continued back pain is due to the fact that her spine was so weakened from cancer and then from radiation and chemo, that is has kindof collapsed and is putting continued pressure on her nerves. He wants to do a little more checking (don't know exactly what that means) and then when Kecia is healed they will consider doing a minor surgery to repair those few discs. He compared it to a "lift" that would help align and provide support. If it works, it is a fairly easy solution to a constant problem for her. They will eventually need to put in another port. It was scheduled to be this upcoming Wednesday, but her counts are pretty low so her doctor wants to just wait and see if her body can "recoup" some on it's own. They are not in a huge hurry because she will still have some Herceptin in her system for awhile. He told Kecia she looks great to him. Her response was "yeah, I guess..." (because she is still feeling like a sickly, "useless" person since she can not work or contribute to the degree that she thinks she should) He was very perceptive and said "Kecia, you are at the end of a very long road and it is time for you to start thinking about living again. It's my job to worry about you now. You need to try and enjoy some of your life for awhile." I like that guy! That's just what Kecia needs...a doctor that she trusts telling her that he will take control so that she doesn't have to. That has been one of the hardest parts for her. This is all really good news and I am so thrilled with how far Kecia has come in her recovery but she is still in need of alot of support and prayer. While talking about all of this tonight Kecia's words were positive but her voice was on the verge of breaking. She is fighting so hard to be tough and strong but she is just so tired. From the outside looking in it is so easy to say "wow, this is the easy part, it's all down hill from here". We see easier chemo, less nausea, one surgery down a few more to go. But Kecia hears...more chemo...more weeks of exhausting radiation, another surgery....It it kindof like she runs the race of her life, but when she gets to the finish line (out of breath and exhausted) instead of getting a little rest, she immediatly starts training for the next big event. She has used up all of her strength on the "big stuff" and now she really needs God to work through us to help pull her through the last leg of this race. For those of us who live close, Kecia really enjoys having visitors. Of course it means being flexible with ones plans since you just have to call and say "hey do you want company in about an hour?, since she never knows in advance how she will feel. But I know it breaks the monotony of her "sick" schedule to talk to people about work..boyfriends...family....anything but cancer! Please pray that God will give Kecia the emotional stength that she needs to finish out this amazing journey. She has come so far, no doubt in the palm of His hand, but she isn't seeing the light at the end of her tunnel just yet. Pray that He will rejuvinate her spirit and shine a light that she can see clearly!

CORRECTION

Hello All: It was brought to may attention that my last update implied that Kecia was planning to quit her job. She is NOT quitting her job! Not only does she greatly admire the management team at Horizon for all they have done to help her, but she will always need the insurance that comes from a company type setting. I wanted to take this moment to better explain myself. It is James and I that are planning to sell our home and began looking for land. We have been planning this for over 4 years now and are just now beginning to feel like "the ball is rolling" in that direction. Kecia is excited about her new found goals and feels like alot the things that she wants to share with other cancer patients could be found in the therapeutic setting of the ranch. Eventually, she would like to offer the group sessions and other opportunities on weekends but that is a LONG way down the road for her. She still has a long way to go in her recovery and that is her number one priority right now. She hopes that in the more near future she will be able to put her mentoring program into use but that is another one of those things that she will do from home when she is strong enough to add it to her schedule. Right now she still needs help making that long trek down the hall from her bedroom to the kitchen, so it is not that she is ready to do these things yet. It's just that I was so excited to find out that she has started dreaming again! I had to share with those who helped make it possible. I'm sorry if I got any of you prematurly excited about her progress.....but if you know Kecia...you know that if she can dream it, she can do it!

Plans for the Future

Update 4-19-09 I order to tell you about the plans Kecia has been making over the past week or so, I will first need to update you on a little history. When I first decided to go back to school to get my master's degree (4 years ago) I knew exactly what I wanted to do. I had big plans that included working with fostor children and troubled teens. I envisioned a working ranch where we rescued abused horses and paired them up with hurting kids for a therapeutic and healing experience. The idea of equine therapy is slowing building a name for itself in the counseling field but there are very few people using it. I hope to be a pioneer in this particular area. Kecia was also looking for a new career and felt that she too would be a good counselor who could help many people. She was not, however, certain just what area she would specialize in. She thought about working with people who suffer from addictions, or even those hospitalized with severe psychiatric problems. Until she discovered her calling, Kecia was content to be a general counselor working with all types of people. This is where her experience with cancer comes in. Through this whole ordeal, Kecia has learned so much that one can never truely understand about "terminal" illnesses or the "death sentences" that come with so many diagnoses, unless they have lived it for themselves. She understands the importance of little things, like having appointments scheduled for you, or being able to cry without worrying that it will upset the people around you. She knows that sometimes people want to make plans just incase they don't make it, and that they aren't weak because they sometimes feel afraid. When I visited her the other day it was as if she had just had an epiphany. She was so excited as she told me that she was beginning to make plans for her future. She started by telling me that at first, being blessed with a miracle of her healing was a little overwhelming. She felt alot of pressure to use this second chance that God had given her for His purpose, but she didn't know what that was. She was afraid that she would be given this gift and then blow it, without ever realizing what she was supposed to be doing. But as she lay in her bed recovering from surgery, the word SERENITY kept coming to mind. She thought about it...how it affected her...her family...and others. What a comforting word it was. She had hated my plan to move out to the country (far from everything that was convenient) to be around dirty horses, ducks, and chickens (which she calls wing-ed things). So you can imagine my suprise when she blurted out that she knew her purpose...and it involved working with me on the ranch, providing the peace, comfort and serenity that only nature can provide, to frightened people who were battling cancer. She envisioned so much more than just counseling for her clients. She wants to start a mentoring program, where survivors are paired with newly diagnosed patients to act as "big-sisters" who encourage, discuss options, and help with resources. She wants to hold support groups at the ranch where clients can give and recieve a Godly perspective on all the issues that touch their lives on a daily basis. She said she finally understands how her grandfather can always have such a positive outlook (even as his wife struggled and died at the hands of alzheimer's) and it's because his focus is not on this life. She said she "gets" it now. And she wants others to get it too. She feels so good to have a purpose again, and even better to know that her purpose will glorify God and the miracle that He has blessed her with. Many of you may not know this, but the job Kecia does at Horizon has counted toward her necessary hours for acheiving her counseling license. She and I will have completed our hours in 4 more weeks and should be "full fledged counselors" by the end of May. Our goal is to have my house sold by next summer so that we can begin looking for land either north or east of here. I have spent years praying on this matter and feel very confident that this is what God has planned for my life. I am so happy to hear that He is leading Kecia in the same direction. I can't think of one single person I would rather work with. There is SO much that will have to work out in order for these dreams to be fulfilled...but I think we all know by know that our God is a mighty One and all things are possible through Him. Please pray that God's will on this subject will be made obvious to us so that we will be led in the right direction. Can you believe that just a few months ago Kecia was afraid to even think a few months in advance, and now she is planning big things for her future!?

Pathology Report

4-17-09 Kecia went in to meet with her surgeon, Dr. Ladly, this morning and get her pathology results from the surgery. More good news! There was absolutly no sign of cancer in either her lymphnode or the breasts. There was, however, a little bit found in the milk ducts. That of course was removed during the surgery so I believe it is safe to say Kecia is now, officially, cancer free! I don't believe I have updated you on some of the problems Kecia was experiencing with her team of doctors over the past few months. To make a long story short, the Cancer Center where she has been treated for the past 8 months has been experiencing some financial troubles which have led to cut backs in staff and services. Kecia is so thankful to her doctor and his team for the amazing job they did to get her to this point in her recovery, but feels that a new team of doctors is what she needs to carry her through this second phase. She has asked Dr. Ladly to head up that team and together they have chosen a new Oncologist. They both work out of Medical City and have all the things Kecia will need as she "rehabs" from cancer. (notice that I no longer spell cancer with a capital "C".) She is SO relieved to have found a competent team who has the time and resources to help her. She has secretly been struggling with the knowlege that she needed to find a new team, but so overwhelmed that she just pushed it aside and let it stew and torment her. Now she is passing off the responsibilty of her rehab to those who are trained to do it, and not worrying about it herself. This is a huge weight off her shoulders. Also, her other doctors were telling her that she would need to continue the Taxatere (the strong one) every month and the Herceptin every week, in addition to 5 weeks of radiation. We questioned the continued use of Taxatere when she is cancer free but they insisted. Dr. Ladley was shocked that they wanted to continue its use and said there is no reason to do that. She does want to do the radiation to "seal" the area were the cancer was removed, but said that Kecia will only need the Herceptin every 3 weeks. What this means for Kecia is that she can look forward to feeling good most of the time! She will be very weak from the radiation and will have a few days of sickness after her Herceptin but that will be a vacation compared to what she has been going through for most of the last 8 months. We are so pleased with the progress she is making! What a mighty God we serve!

Home Sweet Home

4-13-09 We were all suprised and pleased when Kecia's doctor announced that she would be coming home today! She is recovering so well...still in a bit of pain, but not more than can be expected. She is still pretty swollen but showing improvement. She is able to move about a little better and is increasing the mobility of her arms and upper body. True to her nature, she is actually "doing too much" according to her doctor and actually passed out after being up out of bed too long this evening. Her doctor was not concerned but told her in no uncertain terms to slow down and allow her body the time it needs to heal slowly. She told me today that she caught herself thinking and planning for the future. She has been taking her life one day at a time for so long now. She hasn't really allowed herself the luxury of planning or thinking too far ahead but last night and today she has enjoyed basking in the idea of a future....her future...a healthy one! She said that while she is SO thankful for all of the prayers and miracles God has sent her way, it comes with the huge pressure of living up to God's plan for her. At first that idea scared her...the idea that because she lived through this whole ordeal she had some very special purpose to fulfill. She doubted whether she would ever know what it was or if she discovered that purpose would she be able to fulfill it? She has spent the last few months really soul searching and trying to find out what special thing God was keeping her here for. We discussed that at length today...and I think you will all be just as excited as she was when she told me about it once you hear what she has to say.....stay tunned 'cause this is just a sneak peek...a commercial if you will....you'll hear more in my next post! LOVE YA"LL!

A Friend in the Hospital

Update 4-11-09 About a week ago, Kecia was in for some pre-op work and she met a young lady in the waiting room who had the tell-tale signs of someone fighting cancer. They struck up a conversation and found out that they had alot of things in common. Sally is a 33 year old woman fighting breast cancer and also scheduled for a double mastectomy. Her heritage is Iranian just like Kecia's and when checking their family trees for any history of breast cancer, both found none. They have the same doctor, the same surgeon and would be in the hospital during the same week. They exchanged phone numbers and promised to keep in touch. After Kecia was assigned to her room they found out that Sally had had her surgery on Wednesday (two days earlier than Kecia) and was in the room three doors down. She visited Kecia's room 3 times yesterday and has been a very positive encouragment for her. It's amazing all of the ways that God sends us what we need in just the way we need it. Kendall and I left the younger kiddos at home with Grandad and went to visit today after church. The girls had made her an Easter basket with homeade cards and goodies. They also made one for Sally and once we got there, Kecia walked Sally's basket down to her which marked her first venture outside of her room. Against the doctors orders, Kecia had looked at her chest earlier in the day, and was horrified by what she described as "frankenstien scars". It was a very difficult thing for her to face and emotionally she struggled with accepting the changes that had occured to her body. While in Sally's room, they compared scars, talked about fears and worked through alot of the emotions they were struggling with. She seemed to feel more comfortable with herself and finds alot of comfort in being able to share this with someone who understands first hand. Physically, she looks really good. Her color is healthy, her face looks full and "bright" again, and she is gaining her strength and stability back slowly but surely. She is still having alot of pain but it is managable most of the time. She needs help doing almost everything, but that is to be expected. Please continue to pray for her speedy recovery and for her emotional strength as she gets used to her "new body".

Update 4-11-09 Kecia is doing well. She had a really rough night after coming out of surgery because her pain meds weren't working for her. They took care of that once the Dr. came in this morning so she got some relief and a little rest. She was up several times to go back and forth from the bathroom to bed and tried to venture out on a little walk around the hall but thought better of it before she got to the door. She is at Medical City Dallas Building A, Room #951 (North Tower) She has her cell phone with her and only turns it on when she is awake and taking calls. I will see her tomorrow after church and will update you again in the evening. I hope everyone has a wonder Easter! Ours couldn't be better, knowing that Kecia is doing well and getting better every day.

Surgery Update: 4-10-09 8:00 Praise God! Kecia is out of surgery. She is resting peacefully in the recovery room and should be brought into the room with family soon. Around 3:30, the surgeon came out to say that she was finished with her part and that it had gone beautifully. They found nothing unexpected or worrisome and said that they were able to remove all cancerous tissues with no problem. She also said that Kecia's bleeding was better controlled that her patients with normal blood levels and they were all very pleased with the results. Around 6:00, the plastic surgeon came out to inform the family that his portion was equally successful and uneventful. He was forced to remove Kecia's port as it was infected and had alot of damaged tissue. He is not the one who can put another port in, so that will have to be done later in the month, but it is a relatively easy surgery compared to this one. It needed to come out so it is actually good news that they were able to get it now. He was able to put in the breast shields which will keep the skin from tightening up and make it easier on her when it comes time to do the implants. Kecia did GREAT! I am so proud of her and thank God for once again coming through for her. I will let you all know tomorrow which room she is in so you can visit or send goodies. She should be there for about 5-7 days. Please join me tonight as I thank God for yet another miracle in our girls recovery story!

Surgery Update-4-10-09 Kecia was taken back to surgery at 10:40 am. She was in good spirits and as peaceful as one can be before a surgery such as this. She knows she is in good hands and wanted me to thank everyone for lifting her up in prayer throughout this whole ordeal. They will be doing a constant blood transfusion through the entire operation. It is expected to last about 8 hours, so I probably won't have much to update before 7 or 8 this evening. I know your day is busy but if you think of Kec off and on please continue to pray for her good health, the surgeons steady and knowlegable hand, and a non eventful surgery. We are so thankful for each of you and the role ya'll are playing in Kecia's recovery.

4-8-09 In Need of Prayer: Kecia spent 7 long hours at the hospital yesterday getting everything ready for Friday's surgery. While not looking forward to it, she has made up her mind that it is necessary and she just wants to get it done. You will imagine then, how disappointed she was to get a call this morning telling her that her blood levels are way too low to proceed as planned. She wanted to go ahead and check into the hospital so they could give her two days worth of infusions but they don't want to do that. The doctors have discussed it and they want her to go ahead and come in tomorrow for the scheduled appointment. (they will give her 4 shots in each breast of radioactive material which will adhere to the cancerous tissue and light it up to make it clearly visible for the surgeon.) They said to come in early Friday for a "pre-surgery infusion" in hopes that it will bring her levels up enough to proceed and then they will have someone infusing her throughout the entire 9 hour surgery. If, however, after beginning the surgery, they see that she is not able to clot, they will have to do nothing but remove the one cancerous breast and then close her up and reschedule everything else. The thought of going through all of this for nothing is very frusterating for Kecia. Even as planned this is going to be a 3 operation process. She can't bear to think it might now turn out to be a 4 or 5 operation thing. She is asking that we all pray that God's hand will be visible in her doctor's decisions. She would like for God to miraculously bring her levels up to a "better than just safe" level. But if that is not His will, she would like for Him to make it very clear as to whether or not they should proceed or postpone so that she doesn't have to do this all over again. Please pray fervently on this subject as Kecia is feeling afraid and unsure and needs our prayerful support. I will let you know if anything else is decided at her appointment tomorrow.

Surgery Update 4-6-09

Kecia is pleased to announce that her port is feeling and looking much better. If it continues healing at this pace she will be able to have surgery as planned. Thank you all for your prayers on this matter. That being said, as the minutes tick closer to the scheduled time of operation, Kecia's anxiety on the subject grows. She knows she needs to have the operation since her breasts are the origin of cancer growth, but the realization that a part of her body will be amputated is very disturbing for her. Emotionally, these last few days have been very difficult for her. I try to prepare her for the grieving process that will begin the moment she wakes up from surgery but one can only prepare so much. Please continue to pray for her spiritual and emotional peace as she begins this not-so-pleasant journey. She meets with her doctor and the surgeon on Tuesday morning for a pre-op evaluation. We are praying that all will be well and they will be able to move forward as planned. Kecia knows the sooner it's done, the sooner she can move on to the next stage in her recovery. Oh how I look forward to the day that she just gets to go in to work or hang out with friends like she used to. I can't wait until she's healthy and "whole" again.